“Mom? I’m really nervous about this exam.”
“A little nervousness is okay…it prompts you to prepare, to study, to do your due diligence.”
He went on to explain, “I just found out about this exam today. This is more than a little nervous, Mom. I’m jittery, jumping out of my skin, nauseous, and I can’t think clearly. It’s almost like I’m panicking. I’m just overwhelmed by it all.”
“You’re right Hon, that’s more than just a little nervousness. That’s a spirit of fear yelling at you.”
“So what do I do about it?”
“What made you finally come in?” my doctor asked with eyes of compassion before glancing down at my chart. “It had gone on long enough and I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I had tried everything I knew to do and it wasn’t enough,” I replied, wondering if I was going to get a brow beating for waiting so long before seeking medical attention. Even as I said it, I thought about how often I’m like that with God: trying to do things on my own before ultimately turning to Him for help when nothing I do makes the situation any better. There is a reason God warns us not to depend on our own understanding—He knows better than we do.
He looked tenderly in my eyes, glanced back at the monitor willing it to sound the usual comforting rhythmic beat before looking back at me and gently alerting me to the new reality of my condition. “I hate to tell you this, but the baby no longer has a heartbeat.”
“What?! No!!” I looked at the doctor and then at my husband who was standing next to the table I was on. We both looked at the monitor and then the doctor in disbelief. “There must be a mistake. Look again,” I begged as tears began to roll down my cheeks.
Dear Mom, In a day and age when social media makes comparison all too tempting and easy, we can be prone to listing our faults faster and longer than we can fill a grocery list on a holiday weekend. But those messages you tell yourself about how inadequate you are, and how you fear the mistakes you have made will scar your precious children for life are lies from the enemy of your soul. We’ve all been there. We’ve all fallen prey to the lying whispers of our enemy.
God bestowed upon you the gift of mothering your particular children because you were the best one to steward, guide, and love them. So as Mother’s Day approaches, I want to remind you of some of the ways you have been a great Mom.
As Mother’s Day approaches, I’ve spent some time reflecting on my experience as a mother. I always dreamed of what it would be like, and had ideals I thought I should live up to. In so many ways I’ve learned and I’ve grown and I’ve matured in my role as a mother, and I wish I’d had the benefit of such wisdom as a younger mother. So to you, younger mother, I share some things to encourage your heart.