Have the words of another ever wounded you and made you feel unloved and unwanted? Or, rejected and alone? Where do you go from there?
Her words cut and left my heart feeling splayed open like a gaping wound. The things she said were her opinion, but offered up as if they were gospel truth. To hear my faults recounted one after another, when all I had tried to do was help, left me shrinking back more and more into myself, trying to retreat to safety before the only thing left was bloody stumps.
Have you ever been assaulted by another’s unfair accusations?
Have you ever been wounded by the untrue words of another?
What to do when you feel unloved
Once I was alone, and able to process the interaction, the tears came. I felt unloved and wounded by her words, so I took it to the Lord in prayer.
“Lord, you know my heart. Search it. If there is anything displeasing to you there, dig it up. Uproot it and replace it with more of you. But Father, heal the wounds that have come from another person’s assessment. Show me the truth.”
I’m so grateful that in His gentleness, he reminded me of Jeremiah 31:3 NIV “The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: ‘I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness.’”
Have you ever considered what that means? In Hebrew, everlasting means “forever, eternity.” His declaration that He has loved with an everlasting love means He loved us from before time began and will continue to love us throughout eternity. He loves us on our good days, and on the days we are not proud of and would prefer to forget!
In the first portion of that verse, when the Lord said He loved you, that usage of love meant to like, be a friend, be a lover, an ally. And when He declares that He has drawn us with loving kindness, in Hebrew it means “loyal.”
Oh how I need someone who will always love me, despite my flaws, and remain loyal to me on my good days and my less than stellar days.
What do you say to someone who feels unloved?
I don’t know where you are today, or what circumstance this finds you in. I don’t know if you ever feel alone, unwanted, or rejected, or perhaps you are fortunate to be surrounded by the love of family and friends.
What I know is that God has declared to us in this one verse that He has been a loyal ally, loving us forever from the beginning of time through eternity.
The love of family and friends can be an extension of God’s love toward us. But we must not look to them to validate our worth or establish our identity. People will let us down. They will sometimes unknowingly hurt, or accuse without all the facts. Their love is often conditional on what we say or do, or how we make them feel. But God promises to love us unconditionally with an unfailing love that is not dependent on our performance. Whenever you’re feeling unloved, remember the truth is there’s Someone who will always love you. He loves you with an everlasting love that He promises will never change.
In Numbers 23:19 (NIV), we are encouraged that “God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind.” What a comfort it is to know that God cannot lie and God does not change His mind. What He sets His mind to, He will accomplish—including loving you and me for all eternity.
I’ve never known a love like that from another person. People let others down, not even because they mean to, but because we’re human. Our feelings are capricious. Our likes, our wants, our attitudes change without reason or warning. But God’s love for us is a fact, not a feeling, and it does not change.
Wherever this finds you today, I pray you will rest in His unfailing love, as your friend and your ally.
I’d love to hear in the comments below how He has shown you his love recently!
Because of Him, #HopePrevails!
Depression doesn’t have to become a permanent part of life.
There is hope.
Hope Prevails: Insights From a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression and the companion Hope Prevails Bible Study help the reader understand how depression comes to be, recover their joy, reclaim their peace, and re-establish their true identity, while knowing their worth, remembering their secure destiny, and being confident that nothing separates them from God’s love.
Hope Prevails and the Hope Prevails Bible Study are must-reads for anyone suffering from depression or knows someone suffering from depression.
So needed today after a heavy conversation yesterday. Timely, praise God. Thanks, Michelle! #coffeeforyourheart
So sorry for your heavy heart Kristi, but grateful that He knows you and loves you tenderly just as you are. You are loved.
Wonderful words to reflect upon today, “But we must not look to them to validate our worth or establish our identity. People will let us down. They will sometimes unknowingly hurt, or accuse without all the facts. Their love is often conditional on what we say or do, or how we make them feel. But God promises to love us unconditionally with an unfailing love that is not dependent on our performance.” Let our hearts be God centered, embracing the unconditional love He has for us, His children! Thank you for sharing this inspirational post Dr. B!
May you find rest in His unconditional love today! I’m blessed you came to sit for a few quiet moments here.
Resting in His love, learning to let go of false accusations, the devils, others.
Those false accusations sting and hurt. But the son of God did not come into the world to condemn the world, but to love and to save!! Thank God for that!!
Thank you. I’m glad He came.
I love the way God loves us. Thanks for this beautiful reminder today.
Isn’t it a comfort to know that His love is perfect in all His ways? So glad you joined us here today!
God has helped me by reminding me that I can do great things through Him, not alone. I need to turn to Him for help to succeed. I love your message. It is so easy to be disheartened at what others say or do. Thank you for this post.
It can be so lonely alone…but I’m grateful that we can do great things through Him, and that He never leaves us or forsakes us. In Him and with Him, we are never alone, and we are never accused or misjudged.
Hi Michelle! Your post is a sweet reminder of God’s faithfulness. Thanks for the encouragement today!
Thanks for joining us today Joy!! Your beautiful picture is a reminder of HIS joy that is given as a gift!! Be blessed today.
I love thinking of God’s love as unfailing. What a comfort in this world!
Yep! I’ve been there–it was especially devastating because it was when my husband’s life hung in the balance during cancer treatment.
God loves me by shining his light on my path just one step at a time. I think if he showed me the whole thing at once, it would scare me to death! He mercifully only shows what I can handle.
Christa, you make a very good point. Aren’t you glad that God knows how much we can handle?
Excellent post, Michelle and good truths to hold onto during difficult times and relationships!
Donna, thank you. We all have those people in our lives, and sadly, can be those people sometimes too.
Thursday, February 10th ~ Hi Michelle, just to let you know that we shared your exceptional blog message on our public Heart”wings” Ministry page this morning.
Thank you for reaching out to hearts around the world to further His kingdom for His purpose and glory! Amen!
Your message can be easily located by scrolling down on our page. You can also share it by clicking on the share buttom just under your message on our page. Here is the link where it was shared [https://www.facebook.com/HeartWingsMinistry]
This was much needed. It is beautifully written and a lovely reminder that although we may feel it sometimes, we are never alone. As Christians we should be joyful however there are times when this world filled with imperfect people can hurt. Thank you for the reminder that although the world will fail us, God never will Pinned & tweeted if buttons are available. Thank you for sharing at #OMHGWW. See you next week.
I’m glad you were encouraged by the post Clearissa. We must remember that joy isn’t dependent on our circumstances but on the giver of all joy. Blessing to you!
Wonderful advice, Michelle. It’s unfortunate that most of us will experience this at one time or another, but I must say THAT person in my life has helped me in a way. As a people-pleaser, this person has helped me remember that I can’t seek the fallible approval of people.
Ashley, I’ve been there too.It’s easy to fall into the trap of trying to please others. I’m grateful for when the Holy Spirit taps me on the shoulder and reminds me to look only to Him.