Have the words of another ever wounded you and made you feel unloved and unwanted? Or, rejected and alone? Where do you go from there?
Her words cut and left my heart feeling splayed open like a gaping wound. The things she said were her opinion, but offered up as if they were gospel truth. To hear my faults recounted one after another, when all I had tried to do was help, left me shrinking back more and more into myself, trying to retreat to safety before the only thing left was bloody stumps.
Have you ever been assaulted by another’s unfair accusations?
Have you ever been wounded by the untrue words of another?
What to do when you feel unloved
Once I was alone, and able to process the interaction, the tears came. I felt unloved and wounded by her words, so I took it to the Lord in prayer.
“Lord, you know my heart. Search it. If there is anything displeasing to you there, dig it up. Uproot it and replace it with more of you. But Father, heal the wounds that have come from another person’s assessment. Show me the truth.”
I’m so grateful that in His gentleness, he reminded me of Jeremiah 31:3 NIV “The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: ‘I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness.’”
Have you ever considered what that means? In Hebrew, everlasting means “forever, eternity.” His declaration that He has loved with an everlasting love means He loved us from before time began and will continue to love us throughout eternity. He loves us on our good days, and on the days we are not proud of and would prefer to forget!
In the first portion of that verse, when the Lord said He loved you, that usage of love meant to like, be a friend, be a lover, an ally. And when He declares that He has drawn us with loving kindness, in Hebrew it means “loyal.”
Oh how I need someone who will always love me, despite my flaws, and remain loyal to me on my good days and my less than stellar days.
What do you say to someone who feels unloved?
I don’t know where you are today, or what circumstance this finds you in. I don’t know if you ever feel alone, unwanted, or rejected, or perhaps you are fortunate to be surrounded by the love of family and friends.
What I know is that God has declared to us in this one verse that He has been a loyal ally, loving us forever from the beginning of time through eternity.
The love of family and friends can be an extension of God’s love toward us. But we must not look to them to validate our worth or establish our identity. People will let us down. They will sometimes unknowingly hurt, or accuse without all the facts. Their love is often conditional on what we say or do, or how we make them feel. But God promises to love us unconditionally with an unfailing love that is not dependent on our performance. Whenever you’re feeling unloved, remember the truth is there’s Someone who will always love you. He loves you with an everlasting love that He promises will never change.
In Numbers 23:19 (NIV), we are encouraged that “God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind.” What a comfort it is to know that God cannot lie and God does not change His mind. What He sets His mind to, He will accomplish—including loving you and me for all eternity.
I’ve never known a love like that from another person. People let others down, not even because they mean to, but because we’re human. Our feelings are capricious. Our likes, our wants, our attitudes change without reason or warning. But God’s love for us is a fact, not a feeling, and it does not change.
Wherever this finds you today, I pray you will rest in His unfailing love, as your friend and your ally.
I’d love to hear in the comments below how He has shown you his love recently!
Because of Him, #HopePrevails!
Depression doesn’t have to become a permanent part of life.
There is hope.
Hope Prevails: Insights From a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression and the companion Hope Prevails Bible Study help the reader understand how depression comes to be, recover their joy, reclaim their peace, and re-establish their true identity, while knowing their worth, remembering their secure destiny, and being confident that nothing separates them from God’s love.