Episode Summary:
Recently, close to Mother’s Day, we aired an episode about overcoming Mother Wounds. We received very positive feedback about that episode (Hope for Healing Mother Wounds), and felt that as we near Father’s Day, knowing that can be a painful day for many, that we should also have an episode about the impact of being fatherless and experiencing Father Wounds.
If you have been left fatherless, or have ever felt wounded by your earthly father, or felt that your relationship with your earthly father has potentially negatively impacted your relationship with your Heavenly Father, then this show is the perfect show for you. You don’t have to be fatherless to experience father wounds.
Today I’m talking with my friend, Lisa Burkhardt Worley, author of The Only Father I Ever Knew: How a Fatherless Child Finally Found True Love. In this episode, Lisa shared her experience of living fatherless from birth, and how she came to realize the need to heal the resulting father wounds that ensued. Lisa shared how she came to experience a relationship with God, her heavenly father, and begin to heal the wound that began when she was left fatherless at birth.
Lisa and I talked about the impact of being fatherless on our personality and our behavior, and how we interact with others. We also talked about some ways to begin the healing process.
In this blog post, Lisa shares The Heartache of Father Wounds: Three Reasons to Embrace God as Father.
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Quotables from the Episode:
A father wound can occur when a relationship with a father was not all God intended it to be; whether from an absent father, an abusive father, or even a father who was physically present but not emotionally present.
A father speaks into your self-esteem. The father is so important to a child’s well-being. When someone is fatherless, they often struggle with self-esteem, and often search elsewhere for the love of a father figure.
Father wounds can occur to boys or girls, men or women.
The Heavenly Father will pursue us. Sometimes we say yes, and sometimes we run the other direction. The decision is ours.
God has a heart for the fatherless. He doesn’t want you to feel alone. But we have to be open to Him stepping into that role of father for us.
We can tell God the Father anything we want to. There is nothing hidden in His sight.
We cannot equate God the Father to our earthly fathers.
Many think of God the Father as distant. But He is our Abba Daddy who views us as His child. He wants an intimate relationship with Him.
If our earthly father was abusive, we think of God as a harsh God. If our earthly father was absent, leaving us fatherless, we think of God as a distant God. But in actuality, He pursues us through His word, through other people.
Search the Bible to see what the Word says about God the Father. He is beyond our comprehension. He has such a deep love for us that it takes God’s power to be able to appreciate how great it is (Eph. 3).
God, out of his love for us, gave mankind free will. That’s the way it is with our earthly fathers who wrong us. Wounded people wound people. Sometimes we need to look to see what kind of a childhood our fathers had, because it can influence how they father us.
If we will forgive our earthly father, it releases something inside us so that we can accept the love of the Heavenly Father.
It’s never too late to get to know your heavenly father. God loves you with a perfect, never-ending love. He loves you so much that He gave His only son so that if we accept His gift, we can live with Him and be loved on forever for eternity, with a perfect love.
Scripture References:
Psalm 68:5 “Father to the fatherless, defender of widows—this is God, whose dwelling is holy.”
1 John 3:1 “See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him.”
Psalm 146:3-5 “Don’t put your confidence in powerful people; there is no help for you there. When they breathe their last, they return to the earth, and all their plans die with them. But joyful are those who have the God of Israel as their helper, whose hope is in the Lord their God.”
Recommended Resources: (If there are affiliate links in this post, meaning, if you click through and make a purchase, I may receive a commission (at no extra cost to you)).
The Only Father I Ever Knew: How a Fatherless Child Finally Found True Love by Lisa Burkhardt Worley
Knowing the Father: A Six-Week Bible Study to Understand God’s Father-Like Attributes by Lisa Burkhardt Worley
Pearls of Promise: A Devotional Designed to Reassure You of God’s Love by Lisa Burkhardt Worley
The Overcoming Life by Jimmy Evans
Hope Prevails: Insights From a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award.
Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award.
Social Media Links for Host and Guest:
To connect with Lisa Burkhardt Worley:
Pearls Of Promise Ministries / A Time To Dream / Facebook / Twitter
For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:
Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube
Guest: Lisa Burkhardt Worley, Author, Speaker, Radio Show Host
Lisa Burkhardt Worley is the founder of Pearls of Promise Ministries, a ministry that helps women overcome past and current dysfunction. Just as a pearl is formed after years of irritation and distress in an oyster shell, God can take our life trials and make something beautiful as well. Lisa is an award-winning author of eight books including her most recent book to help the fatherless, The Only Father I Ever Knew: How a Fatherless Child Finally Found True Love. She is releasing a six-week Bible study, Knowing the Father: A Six-Week Bible Study to Understand God’s Father-Like Attributes, in May. Lisa’s other books include four-time literary award winner, If I Only Had…Wrapping Yourself in God’s Truth During Storms of Insecurity, the Pearls of Promise: A Devotional Designed to Reassure You of God’s Love, and two children’s books, The Most Powerful P and The Most Powerful P Activity Book and Prayer Journal. Lisa is also the co-editor of Stories of Roaring Faith, Volumes 1-3 and is currently working on Volume 4.
Lisa is currently an international radio show co-host and spent nineteen years as a national television sports reporter (HBO Sports and ESPN), regional anchor on the Madison Square Garden Network in New York City, and local sportscaster. Her radio show with co-host Donna Skell, “A Time to Dream” can be heard on four different platforms throughout the week. In addition to her work with Pearls of Promise, Lisa is also the Director of Special Projects for Roaring Lambs Ministries, and is an Advisory Board member and Vice-President of Marketing for Christian Women in Media. She serves at her church, Gateway, as Intercessory Prayer Leader for Jewish Ministries. Lisa earned a Masters of Theological Studies degree from SMU Perkins School of Theology, graduating Magna Cum Laude.
Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson
Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson
This is so true and real. God is the only one who can fill the void or what is missing in our lives. I am very thankful and fortunate to have parents who loved each other and turn their lives over to the Lord. My dad was in the Air Force and gone quite often, but he often called me his buddy. I loved him so much. His own dad died when he was 12 years old. I think my mother was more of the stronghold of our family when it came to following the Lord, when my parents moved back home both re-dedicated their lives to the Lord. My dad was honest, thoughtful of others and always took good care of his family.
I know my mother had a hard time with her own dad. Her dad lost both parents at a young age. His sister helped him, but part of the time, they both lived on the streets. Unfortunately, he was not always pleasant to be around and he did some things that made others uncomfortable to be around him. I am not sure of the whole story, but he went to work and later met my grandmother who was a Christian. He was not a Christian, but my mother forgave him and prayed for him. She said if her life meant anything, she hoped her dad would come to know the Lord. After she passed away, someone came to visit my grandfather and lead him to the Lord. A year later he passed away.
It often is hard to look at the whole picture, but the truth is it comes to us making the right choice, being forgiving, and living for the Lord. We can trust God to help us and give us the love we are seeking.
I am blessed to have had a terrific dad, one who daily showed that he loved the Lord and his family. There’s never been any doubt that the relationship laid a strong foundation for my relationship with my Heavenly Father. Both have helped me become more and more aware of how important both are in our lives. Thank you for addressing this powerful aspect of our lives.
Thank you Michelle and Lisa, this is such a needed topic, especially this time of year. I feel that fatherhood is under attack from Satan because God is our Father and fatherhood should be a picture of that. Thanks for linking up at InstaEncouragements!