In life, we often encounter moments of great pain and suffering that can leave us feeling lost and hopeless. However, let’s remember that “no pain is wasted.” These hardships, no matter how difficult, can serve a purpose and lead to transformation and growth. Even in our darkest moments, there is a glimmer of hope and a chance for our pain to be used for something greater.
It had been weeks that I had been despairing deep within. I looked at my surroundings and nothing was changing. All I could see were the same four walls. Yet it seemed they were closing in. On bed-rest, attached to IV’s, and in continuous pain, nothing about me resembled my usual self.
My strength was failing. Sorrow was all I could taste. Hope was more than I could bear. I didn’t know what the next day would bring, but I couldn’t stand more of the same.
Finding purpose in pain
Every tear shed, every moment of agony endured, I held onto the belief that no pain is wasted in the hands of a compassionate and loving God.
In the midst of my suffering, I clung to the hope that even the darkest moments have a purpose, that God can bring beauty from ashes and use our pain for His greater glory.
There were days that felt like a blur of indistinct activity. I knew hours passed because the sun had risen and set, yet I couldn’t tell you any of the detail in between.
Life went on for everyone else. They continued with work and school and their families. Meanwhile, I felt useless, not able to carry on my usual productive routine. I felt like I had failed…myself, my family, even God. So much for the Super Woman exterior I always tried to portray.
Others said they were thinking of me. That they were praying.
Were they really?
I wasn’t so sure.
I wasn’t feeling any better.
And shamefully, if I was honest with myself, hadn’t I promised to pray for others in the past and then forgotten? I too had told people I was “thinking about” others before, and I had, but what did that mean, really? Now I really wondered. Really.
Sharing sorrow with those in pain
We are encouraged in scripture, “When others are happy, be happy with them. If they are sad, share their sorrow.” (Romans 12:15)
The sorrow I felt was different from anything I had ever known before. What started as very intense physical, medically-induced pain, led to soul-churning despair. As my physical energy was depleted, so was my emotional reserve.
Friends and family didn’t know how to respond. They were unaccustomed to seeing me in anything other than my driven, take-charge, “can-do” mentality. Instead, they saw a very fragile physical shell, grasping to hold on to the desire to try to find my way back to any likeness of my former self.
But there was one thing I knew that they didn’t. If I was going to fight for my physical and emotional health to return, I didn’t want to be left unchanged. I prayed repeatedly that this torment that I endured would not be wasted and that the Lord would use this experience to draw me closer to Him, AND to help someone else.
No pain is wasted: a test of faith
I am so grateful to God to be able to tell you, He has not left me unchanged. That painful experience changed and challenged me in many ways I couldn’t have expected. It tested my faith and made me seek truth. It made me confront God on some hard issues. It made me put my trust in God and not in people. And even before the IV’s were removed, it gave me a chance to comfort others who were in pain, and really pray for them when I promised I would.
No pain is wasted. God used my pain to help others. And he will use yours in ways you can’t even imagine.
He can use our struggles to shape us into vessels of His grace, instruments of His peace, and transform our deepest hurts into sources of strength and compassion.
To this day, if I tell you I will pray for you, I will–not just once, or twice, but every time I think of you, or the Lord puts you on my heart, or until you tell me you have seen an answer to your situation. Because I know how important it is to be happy with those who are happy, and to share in the sorrow of those who are in pain!
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Is there someone you can be that friend to today?
Are you the one in need of a comforting friend today?
Will you allow me to pray for you?
Father, I know what it feels like to be in the depths of despair and to feel alone. I pray for this dear one who is in need of the comfort of a friend. Will you please provide for his/her needs today. Will you provide a friend to walk this journey with him/her? In the meantime, you have sent the ultimate comforter in the form of the Holy Spirit. Go into the depths of their despair with your soothing balm, and give your peace that truly passes all understanding. I thank you for meeting our needs even now. Let this dear reader know that no pain is wasted. I thank you for meeting our needs even now. Amen.
Hope Prevails,
Dr. B
In the depths of despair, it's hard to see any light. But I've learned that #nopainiswasted. Each tear and #trial has the potential to transform us, drawing us closer to deeper #compassion and understanding. Share on X My pain tested and deepened my #faith, teaching me that suffering can lead to divine purpose. I now see every challenge as an opportunity to grow and help others. Let's find strength and purpose in our #pain. 🙏 #FaithJourney… Share on X
The Hem of His Garment
Now Available!
We all experience pain from time to time, and not just physical pain, but also emotional pain, relational pain, spiritual pain, grief and loss.
I’ve been there. I’ve experienced each one of those types of pain. I’ve asked the hard questions. I’ve searched the scriptures for biblical examples and lessons learned through pain and suffering. And I’m sharing a fresh perspective in my new book “The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms.”
Here’s what Shonda Whitworth, author of Appeal to the Courtroom of Heaven: Petitions for Prisoners and Prison Families and co-founder of Fortress of Hope Ministries, Inc., had to say about The Hem of His Garment: “Dr. Michelle’s courage, compassion, and faith fills every page of The Hem of His Garment. As a fellow pain sufferer, I’ve cried out, “God, can’t you give me a how-to guide?” God has answered this prayer for those who are walking through the valley of pain. Drawing from the experience of her own sufferings combined with biblical truths, Dr. B provides a step-by-step guide on how to walk through the darkness of pain yet radiate the glory of God. This book addresses the tough questions many silent sufferers want to ask but rarely discuss with others. Readers will find encouragement, support, and the inspiration to carry on amid their pain.”
The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms is now available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, ChristianBook.com, Books-A-Million, and other fine book retailers.
Click here to learn more: The Hem of His Garment.
i really needed to read that right now, thank you
I’m glad it touched you. I hope you’ll come by again, often. Hope Prevails, truly!
Beautiful
Thank you Isabelle!
Thanks for your transparency…
How can we truly help others in their time of need when prayer simply doesn’t seem like “enough”? I really feel like I failed you in your deepest struggle but I don’t know what I could have done differently.
Also, how do you effectively minister to someone else when your own heart and soul are drowning in despair? Some good things for me to ponder here! Love you, dear treasured cousin and friend.
Sue, as humans we all “fail” each other, in that only God can meet all our needs. I wanted people to meet my needs, but God wanted me to see that He needed to be my source. BUT, we are called to bear one another’s burdens, laugh with those who laugh, weep with those who weep.
When our own heart and soul are drowning in despair, perhaps that is when we pray and ask that God will provide someone to step in and bridge the gap until we can be there again. He doesn’t require us to be all things to all people.
Sometimes prayer is all we can practically do, and when that is the case, we must pray, and then not apologize that it is “all” we can do-it is the most powerful thing we can do.
And for the record, you have never once in your life failed me. You have been there for me when no one else was. You’ve forgiven me, and you’ve never judged me. I love you! Hope Prevails!
Michelle~ You are precious and you are loved! I’m so thankful God saw fit to place us in the same family!!
So very well written and I loved what you said about how the pain is the thing that brings you closer to God because no human can understand what you are feeling when they are all used to you being super human.
God can use any situation for our good and His glory Faydra. We may not like the situation at the time – I certainly didn’t! But, we have to trust that we have but a small snapshot when He paints the entire canvas.
Beautifully written.
Powerful, poignant and beautifully written! Prayer is essential, and I like praying for people, not just once but every time I think of them. There is always something you can lift to God for or about a person, right? Thanks for bringing your story to us today. Ended up here from 500 Words group.
Thank you Sherrey! There is power in prayer. We struggle not against flesh and blood, but against powers and principalities… and when God brings someone to mind, He may be giving us the privilege of joining in the battle for that person. Hope Prevails!
What a powerful testimony of God’s love and sustaining power. The epitome of ” For we know all things works together for our good. Your comments about praying made me think of how Job at the conclusion of his testing prayer for his friends, they were healed and he was restored. I’m sure he was not the same either. I like your comment of not wasting the pain. Your ministry to those who read your post or you see in your office are blessed and gain healing through your restored life. Blessings
Robin, Thanks for coming by and taking the time to comment. I smile as I read your comment about Job…I am very sure that Job had no idea how many lives his trials would impact. His trials and his endurance through them impacted me during mine! I pray God will use my pain to comfort others! Hope Prevails!
Thank you for your honesty which translated to hard-won wisdom for me. I am so grateful that in your pain you were able to partner with God to learn and grow and minister. “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, SO THAT we can comfort others with the comfort we ourselves receive from God” (2 Cor. 1:3). So glad I visited from Wednesday Prayer Girls today!
I am thrilled that you visited and took the time to comment Kim! It’s a great encouragement to me. God’s word is truth. Our trials do produce perseverance. And while that may not seem like a treasured outcome when we are in the middle of a trial, I am grateful for it so that I will be better able to handle the next trial. It IS my desire to comfort OTHERS with the very same comfort I have been given! I hope you’ll come by often! Bring a friend. The more, the merrier. Hope Prevails.
I have asked the Lord to change me, to not let me stay the same, through a rough, painful season. I know he has and I trust He will continue the changes. Thank you for sharing with us!
Cathy, the Lord will not turn away the earnest cries of His children. Lasting change is a slow process, and growth comes from walking through the rough, painful seasons. He won’t let you stay the same, because He wants to use you as a testimony for His glory. Keep asking and then thanking Him for HIs answers! Hope Prevails!
Sweet Michelle, I’m so happy to hear how the Lord worked through your pain. Know that, when I said I was praying, I did, and still do. You’re a special lady and I hate that you’ve had to suffer so much, and yet, I’ve been there too. What’s that saying? What doesn’t break us makes us stronger? I hear strength in your powerful words of wisdom, and in the pain you suffered.
Love you!
Danie
Danie, I truly know that many who said they were praying, did pray, often and fervently. Yet the situation made me re-evaluate my own commitment to others when I offer to pray for them, as well as to recognize the inherent value of offering that gift. So often we say “I wish there was more I could do,” and yes, if there is something else God lays on our hearts to physically do for another, we should do it. But we should not apologize when “all” we can do is pray – that is the highest privilege and the most powerful gift we can offer. My desire now is to share the comfort with others that I was given. For truly, my friend, Hope Prevails!
Sweet Michelle, I remember those days and praying from afar. So thankful for the friendship God has given me with you and other godly women. Thank you for your encouraging words. I needed this today as I slog through the stress of change. I’m holding fast to the One who never changes knowing that through HIM “I can do all things. . . “
All so true!
Michelle, it felt like you we’re talking directly to me. I recently came to know that no pain is wasted. Chronic pain and several chronic illness sister here. I find that there is purpose to my pain, I don’t know wjat it is, but God is using me for His glory.
And, I’ve said this before on your Fb. But you remain on my physical hand written prayer list in my journal. You are there every day when I open it to my prayer page and talk to Jesus for everyone on it. You’ve been there for quite some time, and on that list you will remain.
Thank you so much for sharing this wonderful tender and encouraging message with Sweet Tea & Friends this month sweet Friend.