Today we’re going to be talking about Persevering in Prayer for Difficult Relationships. We all have those prickly, difficult people in our lives that challenge us. My guest, Lyli Dunbar, and I talk about three types of difficult people, how we can set boundaries, and how we can pray for the difficult people in our lives.
Lyli shares more about the strategy she learned when praying for difficult people to change: Keeping Hope Alive as You Pray for a Difficult Person to Change
Watch on YouTube:
Quotables from the Episode:
- I have chosen to view difficult relationships as my mission field instead of my battlefield.
- I have what I refer to as my “Holy Spirit Hit List” of difficult people that God has called me to love and pray for.
- 3 Types of Difficult People: the bulldozer who has a lot to say but doesn’t listen well to others, the party all the time who causes chaos and wants you to clean up their messes, and the Eeyore/complainer who lacks teachability and progress but just wants to whine and complain.
- God got a hold of my heart and reminded me that it’s His kindness that leads to repentance – not my nagging.
- We are to be the hands and feet of Jesus in others’ lives but be aware of false burden bearing.
- Your job is not to change difficult people but to love them. But we have to let go of the disease to please.
- Difficult people tend to carry a lot of pain around in them.
- Be intentional; create margin and space around the interactions with difficult people, pray up before you engage, and do something fun to decompress or debrief after interacting.
- I made a conscious decision to choose love and fight for redemption in these relationships, and I’ve seen how persevering love makes a powerful difference.
- Jesus washed the feet of Judas even knowing what Judas would ultimately do to him.
- I can either offer God my all today, or I can keep making excuses and miss out on seeing Him at work in my life.
- I don’t want to live a lukewarm life. I want to kindle a vibrant faith and keep a holy fire ablaze in my heart.
- I want to say YES to freedom in Christ and NO to bondage and defeat.
- When you go home after an interaction with a difficult person, and think about the interaction over and over, you probably need to set some boundaries in that relationship.
- Stubborn hearts soften as we step forward with open hearts and arms outstretched. Love triumphs every time.
- In praying for difficult people, incorporate scripture such as Acts 6:18-20 in your prayers for them.
- Colossians 3:12-15 (NLT): “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. 14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
- Proverbs 10:12 (NLT): “Hatred stirs up quarrels, but love makes up for all offenses.”
- Ephesians 4:2 (NLT): “Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.”
- Acts 26:18-20 (NLT): “…to open their eyes, to they may turn from darkness to light and from the power of Satan to God. Then they will receive forgiveness for their sins and be given a place among God’s people, who are set apart by faith in me…I preached first to those in Damascus, then in Jerusalem and throughout all Judea, and also to the Gentiles, that all must repent of their sins and turn to God—and prove they have changed by the good things they do.”
Recommended Resources: (If there are affiliate links in this post, meaning, if you click through and make a purchase, I may receive a commission (at no extra cost to you)).
- Boundaries by John Townsend and Henry Cloud
- Safe People: How to Find Relationships that are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren’t by John Townsend and Henry Cloud
- How to Have That Difficult Conversation by John Townsend and Henry Cloud
- Who’s Pushing Your Buttons by John Townsend and Henry Cloud
- Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win
- Award-Winning Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
- Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
- Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
- Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
- Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
Social Media Links for Guest and Host:
Stay connected with Lyli Dunbar:
For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:
About Lyli Dunbar
Lyli Dunbar’s burning passion as a writer, speaker and Biblical life coach is to fuel a wildfire faith in the weary hearted. She starts every weekday by digging into the Word verse by verse with thousands of women as a writer for Proverbs 31 Ministries’ First 5 App and Love God Greatly. A fireball at heart, Lyli is energized by singing karaoke in the car with her husband, reading 12 books at a time, and cooking Cuban food for a full house. Stop by lylidunbar.com to grab faith fuel for your day or connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter.
Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson
Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson