Episode Summary:

Have you ever experienced relational pain? Those interpersonal relationships that cause you pain and heartache? Maybe even rejection or betrayal? Most of us have experienced relationships that cause us pain, but it’s not something that is talked about very much. How do we deal with it? What happens in the fallout? How do we move on? Jessica Van Roekel and I talk about relationship pain and the hope that’s available.


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Quotables from the episode:

  • We are all familiar with the concept of pain. And when someone breaks a leg or has surgery, people can relate and feel a sense of compassion because of physical pain. But one area that causes great pain, but that we rarely talk about but need to is relationship pain!
  • Relationship pain is so personal, and we often don’t understand why it happened, what we did to contribute to it, or why the other party isn’t open to resolving it.
  • Some of the ways we experience relationship pain is through another’s criticism, judgment, betrayal, rejection, or severing a relationship.
  • Some of the typical reactions to relationship pain are being offended, feeling defeated, anger, fear, defensiveness, retaliation, grief, despair, mourning.
  • Relationship pain is different than some of the other types of pain because even though it may still hurt, sometimes we are called to shake the dust off our feet and move on if reconciliation isn’t possible.
  • If you are dealing with relationship pain, remember three things: God knows your heart. He will be your defender. Remember that you are already accepted by God.


Scripture References:

  • Psalm 5:11 But let all who take refuge in You be glad, Let them ever sing for joy; And may You shelter them, That those who love Your name may exult in You.
  • Psalm 23:5 You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings.
  • Hebrews 13:6 “So we say with confidence, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?’”


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Jessica Van Roekel, authorJessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others.





Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson
Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson


Ever felt the sting of relationship pain? Betrayal, rejection, heartache – we've all been there. How do we deal with it and move on? What happens in the fallout? Jessica Van Roekel and I talk about relationship pain and the path to hope and healing.