“He’s gone.”
Two little words were all she sent, but they were all I needed. I knew what they meant.
Our friend, brother in Christ, and beloved prayer warrior was no longer in pain and was now in his heavenly home. But for those of us who loved him dearly, the real pain would begin.
I had been waiting for the news all week, yet all the while praying for a miracle. He had been put on hospice after the MRI and EEG I encouraged him to get revealed a brain tumor. He didn’t have long. We just didn’t know how long.
When I made that recommendation, I had no idea it would be the last time we would talk. It would be the last time I would hear his signature, “Copy that, Houston?” It would be that last time we would pray together. We just never know.
I was in the car with my family when I received those two definitive words. Tears caught my breath and choked back the words. They sat in silence, suspecting what I knew. All week they had asked each day, “Mom, how’s your friend?” Finally, I whispered what was needed to be said to make it real, “He’s with Jesus now.”
The air was thick, and not just because the summer rains had just blown through on the island on which we were vacationing. I could hardly catch my breath through the sobs that raked my heart as I wondered how I would make it without his encouragement and prayers.
My family stayed quiet, and my husband held my hand, giving me time to mourn for what seemed like an hour although I’m sure it was just a few minutes before we resumed our vacation activities. It was my youngest who finally broke the silence.
“Are you going to be okay, Mom?”
“Yes, Sugar Bear, I’ll be okay. I’ll miss him very much. But God has always been faithful and He’s not going to stop now.”
We continued on with our next activity, all the while with my thoughts very much with his family and friends who were mourning the loss of their husband, father, grandfather, and friend.
My other son later asked, almost in passing, “How will you make it, Mom?”
I thought for a moment before responding, “By focusing on the blessing of what God gave me, Honey, rather than what I lost.”
It’s a good thing to grieve, healthy even. But focusing on what we don’t have is a poverty mindset, whereas focusing on how God has blessed us is a joy-producing mindset consistent with being a daughter of the most-high God.
This is not the first loss I have suffered. I have lost numerous friends and family members. My spiritual mother, greatest cheerleader, and amazing prayer warrior went home to be with the Lord just over a year ago as well. At the time, I wasn’t sure I’d ever recover from her death. And today, with the grief so fresh from the loss of this dear friend, I don’t know how God gets us through such difficult times. But I know He does.
All I know to do is to stand on His promises. In times like this I rely on promises like Isaiah 43:2 which says, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they will not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched, Nor will the flame burn you.”
If you are going through a difficult time today, my heart goes out to you. Let me encourage you to rely on God. He is good and He is faithful, every time. I don’t know how He gets us through the difficult times, but He does.
Have you seen God’s faithfulness in the difficult times in your life? If so, I’d love to hear about it in the comments below! You just might encourage someone who needs it right now during their difficult circumstances!
Because of Him, #HopePrevails!
(If you have a question you’d like Dr. B to answer, contact her here now. Your name and identity will be kept confidential.)
I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. I am thankful for the friendship that you two shared. Hugs.
Thank you sweet friend. Thanking God for him and for you! #HopePrevails!
Hi Michelle so sorry for you loss. This quote from your article really stood out to me:
“But focusing on what we don’t have is a poverty mindset, whereas focusing on how God has blessed us is a joy-producing mindset consistent with being a daughter of the most-high God.” I never thought of it that way before (a poverty mindset), but Praise God! I won’t think of it any other way from now on! ~Julia Melatis
You are always in my thoughts and prayers, but this week has been even more. I am praying for you and for the family of your friend. You are amazing! Even when you are struggling in your own grief, you take time out to help others. I thank you for that. <3 I am so grateful for you! #HopePrevails! 🙂 <3
A simply beautiful post, Michelle…still praying for you as you grieve. I am glad your family is so wonderfully supportive at such a time as this. xx
Grief is one of the hardest transitions in life. It often makes us vulnerable to our flesh and having more questions than answers, but as you stated, we must constantly remind ourselves that God is faithful. Everyone serves a purpose and its a blessing to live a life well-lived. I pray you continue to experience peace that surpasses understanding. *BigHug* #LiveFreeThursday
Thanks for sharing. Sorry for your loss. Death and loss are so difficult and go so deep but G-d is greater and He is faithful in the midst. Thanks for your insight. Grace to you! FMF #41
So sorry Michelle. I had tears reading this. An uncle was just put on hospice today – brain cancer, lung cancer the last few months and now a very rare kind has ravaged his body. We are headed out of town to see him in the morning one last time as he’ll not know us in a few days.
HUGS to you today my friend.
grief sticks in your throat at the oddest times. bless you as you continue to focus on our Hope.
Yes, God is faithful. I’ve personally experienced that everything but God was taken from me. But God was more than enough. Thanks for your post. Grace-filled Blessings to you!
I am so sorry for your loss, but rejoice with you that you will one day see your friend again in Heaven.
Thank you for this very encouraging post. Wonderful reminders of God’s faithfulness. He indeed catches every tear we shed. “Mourning may last for a night, but joy comes in the morning.”
Thank you for this reminder to grieve what is lost while remaining thankful for our blessings.
What a beautiful reminder that #HopePrevails – I can’t hear it enough – God prevails in all.
Praying for you, Michelle, in this time of loss. Praying for your hope to prevail! Thank you for sharing this hope at #MomentsofHope.
Blessings,
Lori